This is my 2nd day using rice milk instead of almond milk, it was actually a coincidence, I didn’t have almond milk and at early hours in the morning only supermarkets are open, and they don’t sell almond milk there, so I settled with rice milk. My first impression was that it made my protein drink much more tolerable, and so after work I set out to the supermarket and bought stock of rice milk to see me through the rest of the detox, but today I was feeling the difference. I was more alert and I could keep going longer before I needed a snack than when I was on the almond milk. That’s good news. Still doesn’t make me happy being in this detox.
Monthly Archives: March 2011
I now have had it with my detox… today I made mistakes at work that aren’t usually mine.Not because I have OCD, but because the action of checking and re-checking is something that needs to be done. Granted, it’s human error, but still.These mistakes were so simple and so little, but takes hours up to a day to fix it. This is not on! I couldn’t focus, I couldn’t concentrate, all I could think about was food no matter how much I fed myself. I have checked and re-checked the project dozens of times, but I didn’t pick up the mistakes until it was on the final product, so after the first mistake I re-did it, the first mistake was because of language barrier though. But after I’ve done it, the second mistake was a mistake that I normally would not miss.
So yes, I am still a little pissed off, but at least I’m feeling much better than the days before. Maybe I’m finally getting used to this diet, or perhaps I may have found food that suits me best for this type of diet.
Well, my morning didn’t start out well… let’s say… by 8am I was so ready to throw my blender to the wall just so I could watch it crumble in pieces. I didn’t have any almond milk so had to make a quick trip to the supermarket to get some rice milk (since almond milk isn’t available at supermarkets). By the time I got home I didn’t have much time left before I had to leave for work. I had to make my protein drink, take my herbs, and prepare some snacks for today… given that my kitchen is small, I was frustrated soon enough when I started making mess, like spilling the milk because of that stupid seal not coming off properly, then spilled the milk again when putting it into the measuring cup, honestly milk cartons are good at doing that! Then when I was making snacks it was scattered all over the place. Not to mention that my place was so messy and out of order because I haven’t unpack and put things to where they should be (hey, give me a break, I just got back that very morning).
So no, I was quite happy to throw my blender and watch it crumble and break a few plates while I was at it… but I didn’t. Luckily my partner was there to calm me down. I was frustrated again. I just wanted something to eat, or something to fill my stomach. I want something solid and filling, not fraking fruits or veges only!!!! I’ve never been a cereal fan, but this morning I really wanted some, or at least a muesli bar (again I was never a fan of muesli bar unless I had to), and I wanted toast so badly… also egg…
If you’re reading this and especially after my days of complaining, perhaps you’re wondering why I’m going through this while I could just stop it at anytime… well… let’s put it this way… I wouldn’t have done it or I would have quit on day 2 if I didn’t need to do this detox.
I contemplated whether I should switch to the 25 day plan or not, and the question became whether I want to put up with this riddiculously strict diet for another 3 weeks. Simply put, I’d rather deal with 5 more days. Along came lunch time and my partner was having my favourite noodles, I had to leave the table because the smell of it just made me want to cry in frustration. I already cried in the morning because I was frustrated and angry, I don’t need another tear up session!
A few hours later I became frustrated and hungry again. IT’s not that I couldn’t eat, it was more about what I could eat. No amount of vege and fruits would be able to make up for the hunger I constantly face. I can deal with no meat for awhile as long as I still can have fish. But I cannot give up all meats completely while having to cut other foods severely too.
I’m the kind of girl who would finish her 200g rare sirloin steak, and all the sides and still have room for desserts. Now that’s not something you’d see everyday from a size 6 (AUS/NZ sizing) girl. I’m half way through my detox, and so far I could say that I wouldn’t recommend the regime to anyone unless they are in need for it.
Today was no different from yesterday. I was still frustrated and I was still very much tempted to quit or switch detox plan. I hated it. I really don’t get why people were raving how great detox was and how it was so good that they’d do it twice a year for maintenance. I was grumpy and moody all the time because I was hungry. I already had to give up so much (including foods I love so much) thanks to my intolerances, so I was not impressed that I have to severely cut other foods too. If it wasn’t because of the hope to clear some things and re-introduce some foods I’m intolerant to, I wouldn’t do the detox.
Well, I wasn’t impressed that I woke up late due to my late night and my neighbour pounding the wall, and I was further unimpressed that my tummy still didn’t feel that well. So I thought I’d just bag the herbs and wait to see if I”d feel better after I’ve had food. After last night’s email I was rather excited to give it a try. A few hours after my first meal I was able to take the herbs.
For the first time in my detox, I felt like I have had enough to eat (though I knew it wasn’t gonna fill me up for very long) and I was at least a little bit happier. Surely enough, it didn’t last long, I was again frustrated, hungry, angry and grumpy, and I’ve also been told that I looked pale.
Frustration grew rapidly on me as I was constantly hungry and only had raw veges and fruits to turn to. By the evening my tummy was feeling uncomfortable, so I skipped the evening herbs as suggested by the guidebook. And in desperation I emailed the founder for more suggestion on how to overcome this constant hunger. The answer was quite promising, and I hope that I’d be able to keep to the 10 day detox instead of having to stop or switch plans.
Oh yeah, the thought of quitting was definitely there. I cried in my kitchen out of frustration, I wanted to throw everything out, I hated the detox, I even said it out loud that I was sick of the detox and didn’t want to do it anymore. I’m not someone who’s adept in the kitchen, and even that the recipe book gave ideas on easy meals with minimum cooking skills, I somehow still didn’t manage to pull it off. I have been hungry for 2 days, I watched my partner ate his lunch full of flavours, crispness, and things I love, I almost could feel a drop of tear rolling down my cheek. And to top it all up, my eczema was flarig out and my hands were just in pain. Yes, I hated being on this diet and I wanted to quit or switch to the gentler plan. I’m not allowed rice or bread, no nuts, no meats, and I found it very very very hard to stick to it.
But my world lit up once I read the email from the founder. I had hope to still be able to finish the 10 day detox program. So we’ll see tomorrow.